BREATHE FROM THE HEART

My transformation of the last few months has taken my own worldview and refined it into what I feel is a very wonderful philosophy and attitude. Many of the things that have transpired have awakened in me a ‘knowing’ that is more than just a faith in the way the world works, it is something that I now know to be verified in my life. The Proof is always in the pudding as they say, and I am now very sure of my view of the Universe as Holographic, Living and Conscious. The belief that we shape our realities with our own minds has been ‘proven’ to me over and over and the last few months have been like graduate school in REARRANGING THE UNIVERSE. The biggest factor in all of this was my spiral into Disbelief of my Self, and my lifelong innate knowing that my perceptions paint my world into reality.
My year plus long depression that started when Giovanni and I broke up and he returned to Italy led me into a wonderful test of my own power and skill at CREATING MY UNIVERSE. It, doubled with my corporate job lay off hit me ‘below the belt’ to make me say, ‘Did I do That’… to the point that I doubted that I HAD created those situations. I started looking at OUTSIDE forces and seeing phantasm enemies afoot working to undermine my Reality Creations. Those thoughts were/are insidious and worked their ‘magic’ in nearly destroying all that I have created out of my life. The point being that it was something in my Thought Patterns that changed, and thus it was reflected in my life.
Do you know what a Hologram is? It is a picture that is made (will not go into the technical) by lasers, and the most fascinating aspect about them is that you can take a hologram and bust it up into a thousand pieces and WITHIN EACH PIECE you can still SEE the WHOLE PICTURE !! No matter how small you cut it up, a Piece will contain the Whole…….. Very much like What a lot of Scientist are saying about our Earth and Universe in new models that are called THE HOLOGRAPHIC UNIVERSE which is also a book by Michael Talbot. Most of America knows this theory by the movie The MATRIX which did show much of how I actually view the world to an every increasing audience. This view might sound fantastical, but is no more fantastic than most if not all theories of how the universe works, plus it does have an advantage,, you can obtain ‘proofs’ of its correctness. This is what happened to me over and over again during my life, until last year when the bubble burst and I went into my ‘spiral’ of self defeat. But as I should have known, my ‘spiral’ held my “Soul lu Tions” that would take me out of one box into what White Crow and I now call “Through the Looking Glass”,,, yes It is very much like Oz and Alice in Wonderland,, but both of those stories hold real keys that most people over look.
Anyway, one of my biggest hurdles was DEPRESSION, which once it grabs ahold of you it is like superglue and unless you are lucky and realize that YOU CONTROL IT. You can be doomed to endless cycles that just go deeper and deeper into the muck. The effects on the body, brain and soul are too well known to describe so you can insert your own depressive memories here as illustrations. The Soul lu tion that I took to HEART was CHANGE PERCEPTION, you have to transform the every going loop that keeps these emotions running. The chemicals that they create in our bodies are released in cascading torrents that only can be stopped by a counter flow of the opposite Emotion. I personally use COMPASSION to awaken and put a finger in the dyke of depression. It did take a good amount of time, but the first thing I did when I realized that I was being sucked down the tubes of unworthiness was to set a Date to be WELL by. I know that might sound funny but most of you know by now that WINTER SOLSTICE was my chosen date to complete this TRANSFORMATION.. You can look through my blog and see that I stepped up my own ATTITUDE and PERCEPTIONS the closer I came to this date. It was a task that was Largely a Solitude Soul Work,, but I called out the Reserves as I knew I had created a Whopper of a REALITY to LIVE. So in July I started this blog, went to the first leg of my transformation workshop,, which was aptly called TRANSFORMUS, a burning man type event. The work would rise and fall accordingly, but in my Minds Eye I set my goal of spiraling the emotive forces with the seasons and the Winter Solstice would be the show stopper. And it was.
So, slowly throughout this process I tamed the disruptive hormones/chemicals in my body, and I did this by a bit of trickery actually,,, I returned to eating meat,, but now am returning to Pure Vegetarian mode,, most likely for good (rest of my life?) I have quit drinking (except an occasional glass of wine/beer) ,, haven’t smoke pot in a number of months, cigarettes NEVER TO BE PICKED UP AGAIN!!! (wish me mucho luck ,, I am doing this without drugs/patches, Cold Turkey) They are the Biggie, I have smoked every now and then since I started the QUIT mode, but with the WINTER SOLSTICE it is OUT OF MY LIFE FOR GOOD. Before the New Year begins, I will fast, to make the Energy I have created ‘set’ permanently into my soul/mind/body.
All these little steps have added up, changed my body chemistry and my Perception is on track to the positive side I wish to remain inside of for my remaining years on Earth.
The main thing is that I have retapped into the HOLOGRAPH of this UNIVERSE, which in REALITY means I have went INSIDE of MYSELF and recovered my bearings. It is ALL WITHIN,, do not let anyone tell you different.. You can search outside of yourself all you want, but even if you view the world different and believe the “Lord, the Devil or whomever” is the one doing it,,, in all reality it is YOU. You may do it by “letting ‘God’ into your life, by being ‘reborn’ or having an estatic experience, but when it gets down to the brass tacks of it all, you create this with your own HEART AND MIND. The mind does the talking, and the Heart does the majority of the ‘real’ work. Thus when I said that I got here by COMPASSION I am telling you a secret ,,, you can learn to Breath through your HEART. The Breathe of Compassion can move in and out of your heart and touch those around you and at the same time HEAL you of many hurdles that you have placed in front of yourself. I know that by loving FULLY everyone, everything that has sentient ability, plus the Universe as a WHOLE, that I have healed my self in the process. Full circle. I intend (INTENT IS A BIGGY) to glue COMPASSION to my Soul in such a way that I will not ever be knocked for a loop like I have experienced this past year and half plus. Compassion will be my ‘sword’. For myself, and those I meet. I will still retain my human foibles and of course I will not be ‘perfect’ but I will hold onto this KEY like the Life Perserver I know it to be and not let go.
Back to the hologram aspects,, this will effect YOU. It will ripple, and move the the MultiVerse, and those closest to me will feel it more immediately, then those I meet serendipitously will respond, and YOU my BLOGSVILLE FRIENDS will feel it too, because I know it to be the most powerful element of Creation that this UNIVERSE has available to us humans. So, like a rock dropped into a pond, the ripple will move out, and touch the Shores that I once clung so desperately to, and those who see them may wonder from whence they came. So that you know I have not went egomaniac on you,, I know where they have come from,, the SOURCE of ALL BEING.
Welcome to ‘my’ Universe, please wipe your feet and only emote LOVE AND COMPASSION.

THE ARTWORK is by a Master Artist, Art Blue, from Asheville NC, the website is:
http://www.motherearthspiritgifts.com/buddhist.html